team photo!

this saturday at liecster we will hav a mens 2nds team photo! so pigeon bring ur camera!! and we will do it after match so paul can be ther :)

Green card for reflexs? and pidgeon meet the ball!

during the game on saturday scott robinson fell over and banged his knee in just the wrong point triggering his reflex's and extending his leg! his leg slightly caught the ball barely noticable and totally accidentle. the umpire stormed over took out her cards and carded him. :O

at a point in saturdays match dave colcomb asked for the ball and a perfectly executed pass at pace was played to him he failed to meet the ball giving it away! (mansfield flash backs for dave)

goal scorer?

silver fox afraid of green giant's green giant??

After a thrilling victory on saturday most of the team went for a victory shower! some sat and watched Ben 'its not an afro' eagles, while some just got stuck in! alan 'the green giant' hillstead, dave 'the pidgeon' colcomb and mat 'the slidetackle' wislon were all bonding in the showers when paul 'the silver fox' halfpenny wondered over to join the celebrations. a short distance from the showers he changed his mind claiming the was no available showers?? altho there was still one shower un-used something scared him away?? was it the team bonding? or was it the green giant's green giant??

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who is freddie???

"Freddie" came to the club not long ago, and made an impression on coach sally 'im down here' davies! He told everyone his name was freddie....... but...... it was discovered on wednesday 23rd september 2009 tht his real name was in fact "alan"?? confusing i know!! why would a man pose as someone else?? THEN on thursday 24th september 2009 his true and very real identity was discovered! he was in fact alan 'The Green Giant' hillstead!! who came to newark to make sure we were all eating our sweetcorn!!

photo evidence--->

Newark Get off to a Flyer

Captain Halfpenny and vice David Colcomb led out the men's 2's in there first match of the season against local rivals Grantham. According to the official match report the 2's lost captain Halfpenny sometime between the start of the match and halftime, which is very careless. If anyone has seen him please let the club know. He looks a bit like this. Despite it being the first game and misplacing there captain the 2's gelled well and on the whole the play was good throughout. Unfortunately I missed the first goal which was scored by young Ryan Foster but he did describe the goal for me apparently he picked the ball up top of Newark’s D took it down the left skinning 4 Grantham players cut inside where he left the 2 centre backs for dead pirouetted onto his reverse and smashed the ball top right in off the angle (the accuracy of this information cant be confirmed). The second half saw more Newark dominance and a characteristic goal from Pixars very own and a some silky skill and calm finish from 'Son of a Legend' Sam Smith. Grantham did pull one back but the game ended 3-1 and a well deserved win to kick start the season.

On review Coach Davies seemed pleased with the performance especially from those who played 3's last season and also hinted at her new found love of Columba livia domestica.

All Change At The Top For The New Season

The 09/10 season is fast approaching and the mighty 2's have a new captain at the helm to lead them in their quest for glory. The youthful, lightning quick Paul Halfpenny (this picture is an artists impression and is not an actual photo of Paul although i have been told it is remarkably accurate, thanks Sally.) has taken the rains and will be looking for a solid start in the 2's first friendly against Grantham on the 5th September.

The Return of the King

The eagerly anticipated return of His Majesty King Arran Augustus Baldy Shrek Coggan the 1st was a big boost to a side much depleted due to a rigorous restructuring program instigated by the men's 1st XI which had seen the 2s lose there last 3 matches.

Newark finally returned to winning ways with a 3:1 win at home against a Derby side much improved from there first meeting earlier in the season but still laking that final finish. The match was not played at a great pace and it was a close game throughout. Newark took the lead thanks to a calm finish from Adam Reynolds however Derby replied quickly and the scores where level going into the break. Both teams wasted numerous chances and Newark in particular wasted alot of possession. After a stern team talk at halftime from coach Davies and one or two pearls of wisdom from abdicated King Arran, Newark still continued to give the ball away. In contrast to the first half however Newark switched the radar back on and thanks to Mark Wheeler took the lead. A third goal came from Cameo Coggan to wrap up the win. Much of the victory however was down to a great defensive performance from John Clarkson who although left exposed alot of the time managed to keep Goalkeeper Brian from having to make too many saves.

With only 2 games remaining lets hope we can finish strong.

50/50

Newark managed one win out of the weekends two matches which is enough to move into 4th place. Getting two teams out was always going to be a struggle but Saturdays match Vs Northampton started well and Newark took a 2:0 lead at half time. Another goal came just after the break courtesy of Sam Smith which was to prove crucial as Northampton piled on the pressure with two quick replies leaving Newark to hang on to win 3:2. A good win in the end but Newark made a match that should have been relatively easy look like a struggle.

The second match of the weekend saw Newark send a side missing no fewer than 8 regular 2s players and probably the youngest side (Excluding Paul. I was going to say Paul and Ace but we all know ace is young at heart) ever put out by the 2's, to play Leicester Westligh. Although Leicester dominated for most of the match Newark took the lead and by half time the score was 1:1. Unfortunately Newarks lack of experience on the pitch showed and Leicester scored 4 in the second half to end the match 5:2 winners. The match was a good eye opener for those young players who have had little or no experience playing for the 2s and with one or two more regular players available the result would of looked very different.

A Fantastic 5 For the Bare 11

After losing 4 players to the first team the remaining 11 put 5 past a Nuneaton side who where all but out of the game in the first 20 minuets. Newarks first goal came after just 20 seconds with some great work down the right flank from Steve Littlewood and a simple finish from man of the match Robbin Lowth. (by the way Robbin due to your MOM performance you owe another £2 in fines). Newark scored regularly throughout the first, another from Lowth and one a piece for Sam Smith, Steve Littlewood and 3rd XI Captain Danny Hendrie. With 5 goals in the first the second half was always going to be a bit of an anti climax. The second half was all about keeping it tight and stout defending by John Clarkson, Adrian Smith, Matt Wilson and Captain Craig Joynes saw that the Newark goal was untroubled throughout. More goals looked likely but the forward pare of Lowth and Super Striker Martin 'Cripple' Knox could not find the finishing touches that had been abundant in the first half. This result could potentially put Newark up to 3rd in the table.



The weekend of the 21st and 22nd will see the 2's have 2 games against Leicester and Northampton. So can all players let captains know there availabilities ASAP.

Hatrick of Wins

Newark came through a hard fought match to complete a well deserved treble over close table rivals Kettering. Newark took the spoils in all three contests this season winning by the old goal in all the matches. It was good to see the majority of the Kettering players understood how tough the matches had been and where willing to shake the hands of the victors at the end of the last match. However it was spoilt a little by one or two primadonas in the Kettering team who's unsporting conduct saw them refuse to shake the Newark captains hand (There is always someone who is delusional and thinks they are better than the rest).


Newark's win came thanks to 2 goals from Matt Hammond and a well placed shot from Paul Halfpenny nutmegging at least 3 Kettering players. Newark also had to thank keeper Brian Morris for some good saves, Adrian Smith for a goal line clearance and the Kettering strikers who where unable to put away a host of chances.

Ladies 2's Disqulaified after Vote Rigging Scandal

The pole watchdog Offpole have been called in to investigate how the ladies 2's managed to rig the latest pole (Which is the best team in the club?). The pole saw a massive 20 votes in favour of the ladies 2's which gave them a 14 vote lead over the heavily favored Men's 2's. After a re-count by "Independent" Adjudicator Bungle The Bear it was found that 17 of the votes for the ladies 2's where invalid. A statement released said "The votes where cast by person/persons who where obviously delusional and not of sound mind. The Winners then after a re-count are the Men's 2's.

Theft Causes cancellation of Match

The theft of 7 men's 2's players means that the mid season friendly against Jaguar Coventry will now not go ahead. Sources have indicated that the culprits might be the men's 1's but the investigation is still ongoing. Other leads have indicated that the missing players have been sold to a Dubai billionaire to raise funds for the club and possible Alien abduction.

Christmas Break Slows Newark's Momentum

Well the first game back after the Christmas break proved to be a disappointing one. The 2s took on Barton a team who before the match where a point below Newark in the table. Without arguably there two most influential players (Knox and Lowth) Newark struggled in the first half to keep up with a Barton side that had a good mix of youth and Experience. Barton created a host of chances but where denied by an on form Morris in goal. The keeper pulled of a host of saves to keep the home side out. It would be fare to say that Barton deserved a goal in the first half but when it came it was a gift from the umpire who controversially allowed an above the back bored shot from a short corner to stand. When asked why he had allowed the goal the umpires response was "It was a flick" well if that was i flick then the Pope is in fact a Muslim. The half time whistle came and with inspiration taken from a Stern Davies team talk Newark where vastly improved in the second half and dominated early. However the luck they needed to compliment there build up play deserted them. 15 mins in to the second half an aerial clearance from Hammond which would easily of found the ball fly deep into the opposition half hit the wire that supported the pitch divider and fell to a Barton forward who caught Newark on the break and the ball found its way into the back of the net. At 2-0 down Newark looked out of it but continued to rally and eventually found a goal from Smith, which on there second half display was much deserved. This gave Newark the impetus to continue pressing but it was not to be at 2-1 a Hammond struck short corner went inches past the post only needing the slightest of touches from Captain Joynes at the near post, but he was too slow to react. The final nail came when a quick break from Barton found there striker one on one with the keeper and a powerful strike found the top corner to give Barton the game.

In Summary Newark started poor (the organisation brought by Knox at the back and the tenacity of Lowth up front where clearly missing), however got it together in the second half. Poor umpiring cost the first goal but Barton probably deserved the lead at the break. Lack of luck and a strategically placed wire cost Newark the second goal but the third goal was piece of magic from the Barton forward. On another day Newark would have come back to gain a point but unfortunately it was not to be. Barton finished deserved winners. 3-1